Explanation of the Unexplained...

Before we go any further I would like to explain the origins of some of my kids' nicknames that may be seen in these blogs--especially for anyone who doesn't know me. I've always been a giver of nicknames. Generally something will pop into my head when I meet someone for the first time, or possibly something someone does or says will come to define them by the nickname that certain "something" causes me to bestow upon them. The nicknames frequently evolve over time (just ask The Wife, aka Schmoopie, Schnoodle, Strudel, Poodle, Noodles...), but sometimes they become fixed. There's no hard and fast rule or anything.

My first daughter has had a plethora of nicknames over her four-and-a-half years on this planet, but the one that seems to come up the most often (and which will be seen most in these blogs) is "Monster". Variations include, but are not limited to: "Little Monster", "My Little Monster" and "The Monster". This probably sounds like something with a negative connotation, but I assure you it's actually a term of endearment. When she was very little I was always amazed by how cute and small she was. I figured that monsters are generally called monsters because there's something "monstrous" about them. They are usually either monstrously large, monstrously ugly, monstrously scary or monstrously strong (or some combination of those traits). Whatever it is, some quality or qualities of the monster tend to be monstrous in some way. I figured that if something could be considered a monster because it was so monstrously huge and ugly, why couldn't something else be considered a monster because it was so monstrously small and cute?

The name stuck. then it became even more appropriate as the Little Monster started showing an interest in some of the things I liked to watch--namely monster and science fiction movies and shows. As I inadvertently (or maybe not-so-inadvertently) started shaping my poor daughter into a Monster Kid in the mold of her dear old Dad, the name "Monster" started seeming even more fitting! For proof that her nickname doesn't have a negative connotation, check out these other variations that she is called from time to time: "Cuteness Monster", "Precious Monster", "Baby Monster", "Mini-Monster" and "Micro-Monster". How could those be interpreted as negative?

My second daughter is a bit of a different story. She gets called "Monster", "The Monster", "The Little Monster" (and even her own variation--"The Littlest Monster") too, but she has also earned her own distinct moniker. As soon as she started crawling she always seemed to be getting into trouble. The only things that she was interested in were things she shouldn't be playing with or messing with (sharp objects, messy objects, fragile objects...). Of course this is a natural trait of babies, and we already saw it with the first Monster, but Number Two seemed to take the concept to an extreme. The problem was exacerbated by the fact that Monster Number One couldn't grasp the idea that her "dangerous" (i.e. small, swallowable, breakable and/or pointy) toys had to be kept out of the reach of her little sister. It was also worsened when the baby transformed into a toddler and started to walk (and seemingly be able to reach a little higher and further every day as she grew). For all of these reasons she became known as the "Insane Beast". I'm not exactly sure why those two words came together, but they did. As I'd run to try to stop her from breaking something (or herself) I'd exclaim "You insane beast!", or something similar. Like with Monster Number One, the name just seemed to stick. "Destructive Creature" has also been used, but it just doesn't have the same ring as "Insane Beast" for whatever reason.

So, when you see my daughters being referred to as Monsters or Insane Beasts, rest assured that there is no ill intent meant toward them. They are simply personal nicknames that may sound a bit outlandish to someone not familiar with me or my ways, but which are generally the same as someone else calling their kids "Sweetheart" or "Honey". Hope this information was helpful to you.